HELP!

Ok... they've found me. 3 years and 10 miles away, I've been found out... by the horrid fruit flies. Once inhabiting apartment 215 CD in Humes Dormitory for endless months (all because of some rotten apple and rotten orange that we got move-in weekend that never left our fridge)-- they have found me out in Rain Tree. I wrote about our infestations in North Knoxville earlier, but apparently West Knoxville is just as prone to having annoying and infuriating pests. You can blame it on our building-- it has *quite possibly* the most unsound structure (as evidenced by the curve in the back wall on the porch where you can see underneath the bricks or the fact that none of the doors shut right-- or you can blame our kitchen, which is currently holding bananas, open watermelon, open cantaloupe, grapes, apples, and peaches-- hey, we like fruit-- what of it?! Many a fruit fly has died just trying to enter the heaven that is our refrigerator. I find their cold little carcasses SOOOO close to the goodness of the fruit, but alas-- one can't fly when one'sbody temperature is a mere 40 degrees farenheit. Muahaha. I sound evil now, don't I? Well, they wouldn't be such a pain if they weren't so darn bold! They fly right up in your face and into your eyeballs every five seconds without a care in the world. You'd think they'd fear the creature that is 2000 times bigger than them, but they don't! It's amazing. God made some fearless creatures... for me to squash. James got so tired of me staring off in the distance and crouching like a cat before going *SMACK* with hands that I think he has deemed fruit flies out of season for hunting. I'll have to find new prey now... please send bug spray...